WILDERNESS

I wrote a little hymn not to long ago, it goes "In your weaknesses I am glorified, in the wilderness: I'll give you your vines."

That verse is my favorite and its its inspired by Hosea 2:14-15 and 2 Corinthians 12:9

"Therefore, behold I will allure her, and bring her into the wilderness, and speak tenderly to her. And there I will give her her vineyards."

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But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses,so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 
In the first verse the Lord is talking about Israel but I can also see it in my own life. When He says I will allure her in to the wilderness the word WILDERNESS means- what is little inhabited, little light, little life. The wilderness can be a scary place and my best guess is that everyone experiences it differently. But, what most graved my attention is the verse after " and there I will give her her vineyards the word VINEYARDS mean- spiritual good. So together I know that the Lord is bringing me into this place of complete stillness, where few ever go, where it is dark and scary he literally allures us into the unknown where we have no choice than to walk by Faith and not by Sight where, we risk it all, where we will be tried and tested and solemnly rely on His strength to carry us through. I remember praying to God "please take me form here why have you put me in this place"? But now I know I needed that wilderness because it was there that He graciously gave me my vineyards (spiritual good). Let me explain, cause you see I felt like so many things where happening for my friends and family except for me and I would get told things like I was doing something wrong. Everybody seemed to be going up the latter except me its like as if I had made a halt and was placed in timeout but everybody else kept moving. And as I saw everyone moving I would panic and be consumed by worry and my future yet something or someone would keep alluring me into that wilderness. No, in the beginning I absolutely did not like it! But in me I just knew I had to be there. and God would always ease that worry and there my trust in Him started surging. I learned that this wilderness is not meant to do us harm rather its meant to mold us, to build character , patience and to cling to God like a scared little child clings to its mother.  I remember reading that verse and crying my eyes out because I quickly thought about what was happening to me at that time and I began to realize that the Lord had not placed me here to punish me rather to change things in me, you see all around me I was seeing my friends who I went to college with started getting better jobs than I and we where all certified to do the same things but for some reason I was not able to get the big jobs they did. At school I decided to switch majors and everyone kept telling me that a theology class or ministry career would not pay the bills. Yes, all of that hurt so bad cause my friends, my family even brothers and sisters at church told me I was wrong. I was afraid, I was scared but I decided to take the risk and remain still. You see God was not really trying to change my circumstances, He was trying to change ME amidst my circumstances! Now I know why because if I was not faithful in my tithes and offerings with the little I had how could I except to be faithful with the big job I desperately wanted? and if I was so focused on my career and my success how could I have expected to seek His kingdom first? If I was so caught up with exalting success and and worshipping it how could I have been faithful before Him? All of those things the Lord knew about me He could have easily let me fall to my own destruction but He covered me with grace, set me aside and decided to be patient with me, to be kind, to speak tenderly to me in my unfaithfullnes He remained faithful. Now its completely different I thank God for taking the time to work on me to put me into this wilderness and bind me to Him to teach me His statutes and out of that little uninhabited place He gave me my victory, my spiritual good to be faithful, to seek His kingdom fist above all things to treasure wisdom and gain insight, to bind faithfullnes, steadfast love across my neck and write them on the tablet of my heart. There is such beauty in that process I was desperate for Him for His will and although I did not know what would happen He kept tugging, kept reaching out, kept pulling me closer and closer. Now I know, I didnt then but with a heart filled with gratitude I pray you see how mighty He works. How far He is willing to go for You and me. In that process we built trust, faith, and hope I had to be patient, I had to surrender things but in the end He remains faithful. So maybe your struggling with letting Go and letting God but dont be afraid the Lord has promised He works all things for the good for those who Love Him and are called according to His purpose. Think and meditate on that take that leap of faith He will catch you. He will teach you things that no one else may understand, no one else may see the change physically but spiritually you become this whole new person with a new perspective with confidence and trust in the Lord. It slowly starts to outpour into everything else and one day you wake up and realize that all along this was His plan and you Praise Him for it, love Him even more, thank Him even more because you realize just how great and mighty He loves. I hope this encourages you to know that in your weaknesses the Lord is glorified it is in our weaknesses that He comes with power and might to change us, it is not forceful its compelling drawing us near. Know that where sin is great grace abounds all the more. He covers us and enthralls us with His love that cause  us to have awe of Him and fear of the Lord. So I pray if you are in that WILDERNESS or are entering it I pray you cling to Him, Pray ,Fast, and wait for the mercy of the Lord. Do no be afraid but let your heart enter into the peace that surpasses all understanding. Be encouraged dont look back even if the whole world is against you because if God is for you who can be against you?!  Who shall you fear?!  I leave you with this verse. and pray the Lord may bless you reader and you find encouragement to fill you with the peace of the Lord. Godbless you!

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding In all your ways acknowledge him , and He will make straight your paths."
Proverbs 3:5-6 

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